|@BiS_GZL on Twitter|
I was talking to this girl. In that dream, she was speaking Portuguese. I thought she could only speak Japanese, so when I asked her about it, she just said, "everyone can speak Portuguese, some people just practice it more."
She just kept on talking about some deep matters I can't really remember, all with a smile and a blush in her face, occasionally looking at me.
There was some kind of gentleness all around that dream. It's really something I won't forget.
It's probably the kind of feeling I had for this idol called Go Zeela (ゴ・ジーラ).
About twisted grunge, I probably listened to this song - I mean, I surely listened to it over 100 times. Not sure how many more over that number. It's one of my favorite songs ever. It has lyrics from Go Zeela, which is a real plus for me, of course; but it has such a nostalgic, hopeful sound to it. I can recognize it from the simple piano melody to the guitar part, all along, all its sounds. It will always fill me with that kind of gentle sadness, melancholic kindness.
|@na0i0i on Twitter|
This was a journey that started in June 2018 when BiS released a new music video and I was immediately hooked on the image of the girl called Go Zeela. Not that I didn't know her before, she just didn't strike me as much as in that time. I really can't explain.
From then, I just started following her. I liked her fashion style so I started buying stuff that I both liked and reminded me of her - it helped me express myself better. Trying to read her words helped me learn a bit more Japanese even if it sometimes didn't make sense. I think it sometimes only made sense to her, lol. I expanded my plushie collection. My friends noticed it and started offering me stuff related to Go Zeela and Godzilla the monster. And I made new friends because of it! I inadvertently introduced new people to BiS and alternative idols and I met new people. I never really imagined this would happen.
In today's meditation session, I was asked to, a few times a day, look around and ask myself "could this be a dream?" This is meant in a way that life can be unique and fleeting and unexpected as a dream. I mean, I was able to videochat with Go Zeela! At some point I really wondered if that was just one of my wildest dreams, but it was pure reality.
BiS (the second iteration) has disbanded as of May 11th, 2019.
This Go Zeela "is dead", she said. I don't know what will happen, but I'm starting to get the impression of "lonely days when I want to meet you but I can't" - it's a sentence from the lyrics of twisted grunge. It's called saudade in Portuguese.
I'm joined by several Japanese fans in this communal sort of mourning, lol, they definitely have interacted more with her than me, but there's something in common.
|@kazuhawks03 on Twitter|
I think it's just that feeling that showed up in my dream. That kind of love and gentleness which I will forever associate to the concept of idol.